International Women’s Day should be everyday.
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I still vividly remember the day I discovered stretch marks on my body. I was probably 11 or 12 years old. I was so scared and confused at all the changes happening to me physically at that tender time of life. I have actively hidden my stretch marks since then. I’m now 30 years old.
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I’ve never had “skinny” legs. I look back to pictures when I was in preschool, and I have always had “meat” on my bones. I grew up dancing at least 3-4 days/week and always had strong thighs. Sometimes i hated it because my friends had “thinner” thighs that I just never had.
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But I also remember a time not so long ago that I was severely depressed and I couldn’t find muscle in my legs anymore. I looked down one day at my legs and they were bony because I had no appetite to eat hardly anything and no energy to exercise at that time in my life. I’ve since then gained back all of that (and then some). And sometimes I don’t know what I even truly look like anymore.
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I say all this to say: it’s all okay. There are things I’ve been ashamed of, things I’ve lost and gained all having to do with my body. I am slowly learning, though, that bodies are meant to change. A woman’s body is meant to grow and shrink, grow and shrink. So why do we feel like we always have to stay the same or look a certain way for all time? It’s not reality.
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The truth is, I’m never going to “love” my 20 year old stretch marks. But they’ve been with me 20 years, and they ain’t going anywhere. I’ve learned my worth has never resided in my body or the way I look. Bodies are just bodies: a collection of skin + bones that house this miraculous thing we call life. I am interested in being at peace with myself: mind, body and soul. I’m no longer interested in focusing on nit picking specific parts anymore. It’s really not worth the time or energy.
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I marvel at the female form and how we literally create life, and that to do so, we are forced to grow, and then we shrink. It is the most amazing, most natural process. Why do we try to harness it and control it so much? I’m asking myself + my fellow women to just let ourselves feel how amazing we are: mind, body and soul. Can’t wait to see what happens.